Dave and I were talking today and I mentioned how blessed I felt that I was receiving some amazing strength from heaven. I truly believe that people are praying for us from here and in heaven, and this gives us strength and extra blessings!
I had to give a funeral talk a few years ago. It, in and of itself was an amazing experience. The person that died actually came to me when I was writing the talk and told me what he wanted me to say. He was shot and killed suddenly, so he didn’t have a chance to bid a proper good-bye to his family. You know how the tears flow and I get choked up when I’m at the pulpit. Well, I prayed for strength to get through that talk without blubbering, because it would have taken away the spirit I was hoping would rest upon the congregation. I don’t know how to describe it, but it was like someone poured extra strength ability to speak without falling apart into my veins! I was bound up with some kind of power beyond my own possibilities! I know it was because of prayers in my behalf.
That is what I am feeling now…bound up with some kind of power beyond my own. I feel an unbelievable amount of patience and peace. The speed has increased in how fast principles of the gospel are being deeply rooted into my understanding and into my heart. I am so amazed at the tender mercies I receive and I love how God points them out to me, and how he shows me over and over and over again, how much he loves me! It’s like entering into a beautiful spring garden and he is showing me all the beautiful things he knows my heart will delight in.
Sometimes trial, tribulation and heart ache are the keys we need to use to get into these places of beauty, light and understanding, but especially love. How interesting that these same keys open two doors…they can also open doors to despair, sorrow and hopelessness. How awesome is it that we have the agency to choose which door we go through.
I was at a doctor’s office the other day and an older man mentioned that he wished he could go back and change his life. I reflected on my life and what I had been through so far. Repeat…No Thanks! It was hard enough the first time! I prefer Jesus’ plan…repent and start fresh…every day! Fabulous!
When I think back on this challenging time, I don’t think I’m going to remember the worries and sad moments, or the heart wrenching moments watching Jake suffer through the cancer treatments, so much as I will remember the warm feelings, the testimony building moments, the blessings and the closer relationship I gained with my Savior and Heavenly Father. Hard? Yes! Worth it? Yes! Would I want to do it again? No…because I have already traveled this road and I would like to try something else…seriously!
My peace is, that no matter how hard or wretched the journey, the sweetness, love and amazing blessings are on the other end of the pendulum and are equal in strength and magnitude!
I didn’t mean to write a sermon! It’s very therapeutic for me to write what’s in my heart. It helps me to feel more grateful when I share, so thanks for listening. :)
Love you guys!