A month ago today, about the same hour as I am typing this blog update, I was sitting in Jake's room listening to his labored breathing. His nurse was there...she had told me a couple hours prior that Jake would not be here much longer. I asked her if I should call Dave...he would be home in a couple hours anyway...she said I should call. Dave left his work immediately and was there with Jake as he passed from this life to the next.
I told Jake it was ok to go...he would be pain free. What would feel worse for me...having Jake in excruciating pain, or not seeing Jake for a long, long time. The house and yard were full of spirits waiting for Jake. I couldn't walk to the kitchen without walking through spirits. The feeling was amazing, calm and so much love! As his breathing stopped, I held him tight...finally I could hold him and hug him without causing him pain and discomfort. His neck was so warm, it was hard to believe that his spirit had left. Yet my head on his chest, no beating heart, no labored breathing, no wincing in pain...I could still feel him there. So I told him it was an honor to be his mother...and I heard his voice say...It was an honor to be your son!
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